Loathing Microsoft

Jan. 31 - Bruce is issuing a call to arms (or at least pitchforks and torches) to fight the biggest eeevil of our times with a battlecry everyone can agree on: Loathing Microsoft.

Good old DOS. Why have you abandoned us?

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Precision Guided Humour

Jan. 28 - The latest assignment from The Alliance of Free Bloggers is to determine What jobs should we allow France to do in Iraq?

To be honest, I am not feeling very charitable right now. Of course, the French haven't given me any reason to feel charitably but I usually at least try to make an effort. Fact is I'm too tired, my fingers are cramped and my toes haven't thawed out.

So I'm sticking with "Don't let them in Iraq at all." They can, if they wish to do something useful, come here and help with snow removal. It warmed up just enough to make the snow heavy - very heavy - and there are still some residential areas of the city where it's pretty rough going.

Okay, I'll try to be more charitable.

Toronto got a lot less snow than other areas in the East, so let's send them to harder hit areas and Toronto will cope. Yeah, that's it. And now I don't appear so self-interested.

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Syria, Dr. Kay

Jan. 26 - I got a really late start today, but want to begin by pointing to some more observations from Roger L. Simon in his post Roshamon on possible Syrian involvement with Saddam's WMD. He also links to more analyses of David Kay's interviews at JunkYardBlog and Dust in the Light.

There needs to be some major snow shoveling here. Mark's brother lives in Sault Ste. Marie so I would normally be downright embarassed to complain about the average snowfall in Toronto, but I think today might just qualify as the exception, but there's no point complaining until it actually stops snowing.

I screwed up my courage earlier to go into the Blogger template and update the blogroll. Two blogs have not only changed urls but names as well, so Moving Target is now Autonomous Source and Too Much to Dream is now Twisted Spinster. I also updated the link for Random Thoughts and added Just Between Us Girls and Let It Bleed, two fine Canadian bloggers.

The Canadian Election Blog has a lot of contributors from the Canadian political spectrum and will prove particularly relevant as everyone assumes an election will be called at some point this year (by the way, I'm going with the name I first saw on Jay Currie's blog for now, although the title "E-Group Election Blog" is on the web bar.)

au currant is an American blogger in London who I discovered through Peaktalk.

Two additions who serve: Neptunus Lex in in the Navy, and Rantings of a homicidalManiak is an army medic stationed in Germany. One of them is actually seeing the world: guess which one!

I thought that The Owner's Manual and Iraq 2.0 were already on the blogroll, but they were evidently among the links lost in cyberspace when blogger went down completely during one of my recent forays into the Blogger Template (and you wonder why I'm reluctant to venture in there.)

Usual request: if I screwed up something, let me know so I can fix it. To err is human, and I'm human.

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John Rhys-Davies

Jan. 23 - I guess it was predictable that there would be a backlash against John Rhys-Davies for remarks he made asserting the worth of Western Civilization and declaring it and its accomplishments worth defending. I'm not going to quote the accusations, but they are in Front Page Magazine as well as Robert Spencer's defence of Rhys-Davies which concludes:

As Rhys-Davies himself put it: "I do not want to see a society where, should I ever have any, my granddaughters have their fingernails pulled out because they are wearing nail varnish. . . . Do not brand me a racist because I am most certainly not. But I will stand by this: Western Christianised Europe has values and experience that is worth defending."

Can Malik guarantee that none of those young Muslims in Holland want to see the Sharia imposed there? Is he willing to renounce the Sharia and work to educate Muslims about how it must be reformed in light of principles of human rights that are recognized universally outside the Islamic world?

If not, then Gimli has nothing whatsoever for which to apologize.

(Link via little green footballs.)

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Bob Keeshan, Captain Kangaroo, passes away

Jan. 23 - Bob Keeshan, 'Captain Kangaroo', dies at age 76- . Sheesh, another part of my childhood has just passed from this mortal coil.

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Precision Guided Humour

Jan. 22 - The latest precision guided humour assignment was to list some War on Terror Side Benefits. This was a toughie, not because I couldn't see any side benefits but it was hard to see them in a humourous light.

Truth is, all I could think of was Frank J. and Allah, both of whom could be considered humourous side benefits (as well as reminders as to why liquids must be kept far, far away from keyboards and mousepads.)

Then a wise man showed me the light.

The airline pilots altered their Welcome Aboard speeches. We began to take another look at some of our allies, and at their current transgressions and past lapses. We made independent yet simultaneous decisions to mock and boycott.

France even annoyed Colin Powell.

New heights of humour erupted last May when France complained it was the target of untruths and thoughtfully provided us with a list of some of the accusations. Journalists who felt insulted that they were not on the list rushed to file new stories about the perfidious French. (The Wa-Po story even put "American intelligence source" in death quotes throughout the article. Heh.)

The sneers from Old Europe caused many of us to dig out our cowboy boots and strap on our six-guns. We remembered The Cowboy Code, authored by Gene Autry, and became downright dangerous.

We flew our flag. Lots of them. But what looks like jingoism or overweening pride to others is actually a sense of how much we are beholden to those who have made the ultimate sacrifice.

We instinctively understood that the best way to deal with madmen was to convince them we are crazier than them. And it worked.

None of this would have been possible without the dedication of the troops, both those who are serving now, and those who served unnoticed but faithfully over the years.

We have found our cheerleaders, but they are sober and thoughtful. They inspire, challenge and encourage us to be better.

Our President is not the greatest orator in our history, but we choose substance over glitz. We remembered that Lincoln was, by all contemporary accounts, a poor orator with a voice that grated on the hearers, yet he led our nation through its darkest period and delivered the definitive understanding of what obligation our dead pass onto us, the living, in The Gettysburg Address.

And President Bush echoed that recognition of obligation, committment and sense of purpose in the State of the Union Address:

Our greatest responsibility is the active defense of the American people. Twenty-eight months have passed since September 11th, 2001 -- over two years without an attack on American soil. And it is tempting to believe that the danger is behind us. That hope is understandable, comforting -- and false. The killing has continued in Bali, Jakarta, Casablanca, Riyadh, Mombasa, Jerusalem, Istanbul, and Baghdad. The terrorists continue to plot against America and the civilized world. And by our will and courage, this danger will be defeated. (Emphasis added for those who think he ignored Israel and the Palestinians.)

So I guess for me, it's all about the things that make me laugh and the things that make me smile - with gratitude and affection - and the things that give me hope.

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Kansas Temperature Conversion Chart

Jan. 20 - This is the time of year when we say hopeful stuff like "It's warmer than it was yesterday" and "It has to warm up before it can snow."

Dedicated smokers have their own definitive line on cold, namely when someone admits It's too cold to finish this cigarette, so let's head back in.

I was sent this KANSAS CONVERSION CHART recently, which is very similar to the Canadian one our Caper friends sent out:

100 DEGREES
California issues a heat alert and allows no one outside of their house.
Kansans go for a nice cool run.

90 DEGREES
South Dakotans call their dogs inside.
Kansans turn off their air conditioning and open the windows.

70 - 80 DEGREES
There's no such thing in Kansas

60 DEGREES ABOVE 0
New Yorkers turn on the heat.
Kansas folks plant their gardens.

50 DEGREES ABOVE 0
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Kansans sunbathe.

Canadian version

50° Fahrenheit (10° C)
Californians shiver uncontrollably,
Canadians plant gardens.

40 DEGREES ABOVE 0
Italian cars won't start.
Kansas people drive with their car windows open.

32 DEGREES ABOVE 0
Distilled water freezes.
Shawnee Lake's water gets thicker.

20 DEGREES ABOVE 0
Floridians wear coats, gloves and woolly hats.
Kansas people throw on a sweatshirt.

15 DEGREES ABOVE 0
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
Kansas people have their final cookout before it gets cold.

0 DEGREES
People in Miami cease to exist.
Kansas people lick the flagpole.

20 DEGREES BELOW 0
Californians fly to get warm in Mexico.
Kansas people get out their winter coats.

40 BELOW
Hollywood disintegrates.
Kansas Girl Scouts begin selling cookies door to door.

Canadian version:

-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)
Mt. St. Helens freezes,
Canadians Girl Guides sell cookies door to door.

60 BELOW
Polar bears begin to evacuate Antarctica.
Kansas Boy Scouts postpone Winter Survival classes until it's cold enough.

80 BELOW
Mount St. Helen's freezes.
Kansas people rent some videos.

100 BELOW
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Kansas people are frustrated because they can't thaw the keg.

Canadian version:

-100° Fahrenheit (-73° C)
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole,
Ottawa canal opens for skating.

-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)
Ethyl alcohol freezes,
Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.

297 BELOW
Microbial life survives on dairy products.
Kansas cows complain that farmers have cold hands.

460 BELOW
ALL atomic motion stops.
Kansas people start saying...."Cold 'nuff for ya?"

Canadian version

-460° Fahrenheit (-273° C)
Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops,
Canadians start saying "cold eh?"

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
Hell freezes over,
Leafs win Stanley Cup.

500 BELOW
Hell freezes over.
The Kansas City Chiefs win the Super Bowl.

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Happy Birthday, Mom

Jan. 20 - A personal note to say Happy Birthday to my Mom, who is a terrific lady, wonderful Grammy, proud Red Hat and the terror of SF Bay Area highway commuters. (I'm probably out of the will for sure now!)

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Traditional Poe birthday observances

Jan. 20 - Adherence to tradition can involve some sticky ethical quandries: for the past 56 years, someone has snuck into the graveyard on Edgar Allen Poe's birthday and placed a bottle of French cognac and three roses on his grave.

This year the tradition was again followed, but the midnight visitor left a note:

"The sacred memory of Poe and his final resting place is no place for French cognac," the note read. "With great reluctance but for respect for family tradition the cognac is placed. The memory of Poe shall live evermore!"

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New Blog Showcase

Jan. 18 - The conversation in the post on Crows and Ravens in Ivy is here made me laugh. Never have this kind of conversation with someone who prefers things stated cleanly. FWIW, my Mark thought the author should have consulted a bird book before writing about crows and ravens, and was more interested in wondering if a flock of ravens was also termed a murder.

Note that this is the same man who can argue for hours about the varying deficiencies and advantages of different baseballs, so it's not as thought he can't grasp subtlety.

UPDATE: Hmm, I'm not sure the url is right because my vote wasn't counted. Anyway, the post may be blogspotted, so try Ctrl+F "Ravens."

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Linky links

Jan. 15 - Jaeger doesn't like the cold up there in Gatineau, and has some very positive things to say about global warming.

Miscellaneous, etc. has snow haiku.

The evil attack squirrel of death attacks innocent biker! Really!

Above link was via Paul, who has some thoughts about the departure of Carol Mosely Braun from the campaign trail.

Damon has little empathy for Dean.

Doggerel Pundit asks Who Is Wretchard in Crouching Trochee - Hidden Writer. (Read The Ballad of Wretchard too.)

The Lemon reports that Howard Dean Leading the Polls in Europe.

SatireWire reports that Jupiter Is Doing Something Wrong.

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Dennis Miller

Jan. 15 - Dennis Miller, probably best known for ending the SNL News with his trademark "And I am out of here!" will soon be hosting a nightly show on CNBC starting Jan. 26 at 9 pm. (I'm assuming that those of us in Canada who can receive the cable station will be able to pick it up.)

Mr. Miller is my kind of whatever it is people call people like me are called (South Park Republican is probably the best well-known) because he believes in individual rights.

Mr. Miller is also not a traditional conservative. "I've always been a pragmatist," he said. "If two gay guys want to get married, it's none of my business. I could care less. More power to them. I'm happy when people fall in love. But if some idiot foreign terrorist wants to blow up their wedding to make a political statement, I would rather kill him before he can do it, or have my country kill him before he can do it, instead of having him do it and punishing him after the fact. If that makes me a right-wing fanatic, I will bask in that assignation."

Mr. Miller said he remained socially liberal. "I think abortion's wrong, but it's none of my business to tell somebody what's wrong," he said. "So I'm pro-choice. I want to keep my nose out of other people's personal business. I guess I fall into conservative when it comes to protecting the United States in a world where a lot of people hate the United States."

(Link via Neale News.)

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More work

Jan. 14 - The title says it all: the reward for a job well done is, as everyone knows, getting assigned to do something similar but harder.

I flirted briefly with the notion of trying to excuse myself due to excessive rabble-rousing, but there are bills to pay and kids to educate and A Good Example to be Set and besides, I do enjoy a challenge.

I should be finished by tomorrow morning, so adios for now.

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Jay Currie

Jan. 13 - Jay Currie has an interesting article up over at Tech Central Station Virtual Israelis. Well worth reading.

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Quick hits

Jan. 12 - I had a major report to finish, but got distracted by some fantastic football yesterday. Although the report is done and sent off I am still behind on my correspondence so my apologies to those I owe responses to and I should be able to get caught up by tomorrow.

The comments seem to be down. Oh well, you get what you pay for, as they say. Is there a halo-scan equivalent to the euphremism "blogspotted"?

In honour of the Toronto District School Board we had a snowball fight this morning (it was a draw.)

I found a terrific article through Jack's Newswatch which helped answer a question that's been nagging at me a couple of weeks (see below.)

By the way, Jack has altered the format of the newswatch a bit to give some information about each link. It's a good, one-stop Canadian news and opinion source so check it daily.

Day by Day has a beauty today.

In other news, U.S. Begins Hoofprinting Canadian Cows at Border over the protests of Canadian bovine-rights advocates over what they called "xenophobic species-profiling."

A new episode of Angel is on tonight, so I'll probably watch it, swearing all the while that it will be the last episode I watch if it doesn't measure up. Next week's episode is going to be Harmony-centric so I guess tonight had better be good. Still, we lost Firefly to save Angel? There is no justice.

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Chirac-English/English/Chirac

Jan. 10 - Indiscriminately following links often gets good results, as in this Canadian blogger who has obligingly translated Chirac-English/English-Chirac which is extremely funny (but where was he when I needed help translating Chretien into any known language?)

He too expresses his outrage about the incomprehensible ban on visible religious symbols in French schools (read crackdown on Muslim girls wearing head scarves) but as I wanted answers, not validation, I'll make do with some pretty well-targeted satire:

But then explain to me how that, in any way, applies to students in a school? Are the religious freedoms of Jean-Pierre the Catholic in some way polluted by the presence of Amal, the strict Muslim? Is her head scarf radiating some kind of religious intolerance that says, "Jean-Pierre, I deny you your right to Easter and Christmas and the Seven Sacraments", merely by its presence? Will Eliad's skullcap somehow destroy his teacher's ability to maintain control of his class, with such blatant religiousity in full view of the other students? I've got to be missing something.

What am I missing? That's actually been the general reaction. If anyone has found that something that everyone else has missed, they aren't admitting it.

Maybe Mike can follow-up with the story about Iraqi Shiite cleric Sayyed Amer al-Husseini proposing a boycott of French products in protest of the ban. Like the French really need more people boycotting their products.

(Link via Au Currant.)

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New Blog Showcase

Jan. 10 - Time again to vote in the The Truth Laid Bear: The New Weblog Showcase.

Canadian Headhunter has a very good one on management styles in Ridiculous Business Books (blogspotted - use Ctrl+F and "ridiculous"). The entire blog has some interesting insights for both workers and management and is lacking the usual mumbo-jumbo so well-beloved by human resources types.

Go Dubya also suspects that the guest editorial by Neal Starkman in the Seattle Post Intelligencer might be more revealing than some leftists might wish about liberal elitism in his post You're Stupid. I'm not talking about all liberals, of course, but I've heard this argument too often, albeit more cleverly disguised, by left-liberals who have concluded that the only possible explanation for the president's popularity and approval ratings is due to gullibility and/or stupidity.

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The guy who is everywhere

Jan. 9 - Too funny: I guess it was inevitable that this guy show up there!

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The S Factor and other quick hits

Jan. 8 - So I get home from work, and decide to read some blogs before I hit the news and get totally side-tracked with some links from Moving Target. And they had more links, and their commenters had some other links, and it was, as you-know-what proclaims, time well wasted.

UPDATE: Alpha Patriot has his own notions about the S Factor.

UPDATE 2: Mark Steyn on the S Factor in the Saturday Spectator. (Link via On the Third Hand.)

It wasn't only Bruce, though. It was also some good links from Colby Cosh and the image of Jay Currie playing in the snow after organizing a vote for Chretien (who didn't come in first, but then he actually had some competition.)

Jack put together an intriguing post "NO -- Ya don't Say?" that links to the CBC, Globe and Mail, Toronto Sun and the National Post (among others). But I have to tell Jack that I do feel safe in Toronto, even at night. That's not actually a good thing, because if people like me didn't feel safe maybe more folks here would demand the City Council act to stop the gang warfare. But apparently the tolerant and inclusive city of Toronto is willing to tolerate the deaths of young black men and the let the residents of some areas be included in the terror of hearing gunfire at night.

Another good waste of time was on a tip via Damien Penny that tonight's PBS Frontline would have a feature about the crackdown on Iranian dissidents, so I watched it and was pleased to see that it focused on Zahra Kazemi. Her body has still not been released to her son, (although Canada has threatened Iran with more soft diplomacy) but he hasn't let up on the pressure and it's good that PBS is helping by not letting Kazemi's death be forgotten.

UPDATE: This is the webpage for Frontline correspondent Jane Kokan's clandestine visit to Iran and her investigation into Zahra Kazemi's death as well as a link to her interview with Nobel Peace Prize winner Shirin Abadi.

From The Story:

In the outskirts of Tehran, Kokan further interviews Arzhang, who shares information about Canadian journalist Zahra Kazemi's last days. "She fought [the interrogators] back, she criticized them, she shouted," Arzhang says. "They cannot endure critics and she fought them back strongly."

Kokan also interviews Stephan Kachemi, Kazemi's son, in Montreal.

Anyway, those are my excuses for blogging so late and, worse of all, getting to the Australian and British press for tomorrow's news without yet seeing today's.

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Theories and the media that spread them

Jan. 8 - This article about the possibility that a no-show passenger on a cancelled Air France flight was an al Qaeda trained bomber has a terrific quote:

"French intelligence services in constant touch with American partners conducted additional investigations that produced no new indications that could confirm the theory put forward by American media," said a police spokeswoman.

If only more people could learn to distinguish between theories and suppositions (often substantiated by "unnamed official sources") put forth by the media from official US government statements.

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