Oct. 20 - The ever nuanced French give another lesson in diplomacy as Dominique de Villepin is said to have boasted that the French will sink the Queen:

THE Queen WILL be stripped of her powers as sovereign by the new EU Constitution, French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin boasted last night.

De Villepin said the new masterplan demands a EUROPEAN policy on foreign affairs.

So the Queen stands to lose her power over foreign policy and new treaties - which would be agreed in Brussels.

Tony Blair vows to defend our control over foreign policy, defence, tax and social policy.

But during the Dimbleby Lecture on BBC1, de Villepin stated categorically: "Europe must have its own foreign policy and be able to fight for its principles.

"This is what the current draft constitution provides for."

His admission supported fears voiced in The Sun last week. (Their emphasis)

He also said the Euro army deal agreed between Mr Blair and French president Jacques Chirac in 1998 signalled the end of Nato.

But De Villepin's biggest surprise came when he claimed his country shares with Britain - "a refusal to surrender."

He seemed to forget France's surrender to Germany by signing an armistice in June 1940.

De Villepin, 49, also claimed France was a "reliable" ally to the US, despite leading opposition to the Iraq war.

He made no mention of how furious Americans famously branded French president Jacques Chirac and his cronies as "cheese-eating surrender monkeys."

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Oct. 17 - The last precision guided humour assignment with The Alliance was to imagine what I would say if I had the floor at a press conference with Jacques Chirac.

I couldn't come up with anything (which is to say I couldn't come up with anything I'd want my mother to read) but it took me awhile to figure out why I was totally blocked.

Actually, once I stopped fretting about it, it turned out to be very simple: I live in Canada, which too is a member of the Axis of Weasels thanks to the PM here, one Jean Chretien, who has surrendered Canadian sovereignty to the Chirac wing of the UN.

The questions I might pose to Chirac would be nothing compared to the questions I would level at Chretien, yet asking Chretien "How could you betray every value of Western civilization" has already been answered: he is an arrogant, self-serving bastard who is more interested in reminding everyone that he's a French-Canadian with strongs ties to France and family ties to the French conglomerate oil company TotalFinaElf.

Chretien has reduced the military budget in Canada to a point that puts Canadian soldiers in Afghanistan in danger because they have inadequate armour on their transports.

He uses the international forums of the UN and G-8 conferences to attack Pres. Bush and the USA, and continues to try his best to enrage the American public.

When the UNSC was contemplating a second resolution, Chretien visited Mexico to persuade them to vote "no" should a second resolution be presented.

Chretien has, as Jay Currie put it in his post French Poodle, reduced Canada to being Chirac's bitch.

What could I possible ask Chirac except "How did you do it?"

Not very scathing or witty, but still fully aware of immense betrayal.

BUT other Alliance members fared a lot better with their responses.

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